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On a recent spring Saturday I had some time to kill and where better to kill time than Kmart, right? As I entered the depressing monstrosity my pulse quickened as it always does when I am heading to a toy department. Previous recent visits already suggested that I would find nothing of interest but then again no toy collector has ever found treasure without consistent persistence. As I entered the section I was startled by this horrible thing, which I set off by walking past it,
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Mind you it was 8am, I was the only person in the store and it was very quiet. I must be honest; Elmo scared the hell out of me. He yelled, laughed, and sang for what seemed like an eternity. Moving right along into another aisle I was again startled when this started barking at me as I walked past,
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Having just recovered from my Kevin Clash scare, Cookie again triggered my fight/flight instinct. I finally made it to the only aisle worth checking out, besides the Lego aisle, of course, and I was betrayed by Star Wars! Nestled right next to the Star Wars figures is this noisy weapon,
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The loud ‘whooshing’ sound and ensuing lightsaber ‘clashes’ just pissed me off. At this point I was really annoyed. It’s only a matter of time before some elderly woman meets her demise by walking by these sensor toys. This and similar experiences in the toy aisle has made me very gun shy when I walk through department stores. I now have an eagle eye out for potential toy bombs. I hate these things!