Thursday, August 23, 2012


Poor E.T. He can never catch a break. Ever since E.T.’s 1982 release and its subsequent re-releases, toy companies have been trying to come up with something “cool” for kids to play with in order to take home their movie experience. For some reason they have never been able to come up with a satisfying toy. On the one hand you wouldn’t think that it would be too difficult. I mean, all the elements are there for cool action figures, play sets, etc. Heck, back in the day I would have loved an E.T. rocket ship but it never came to pass. Even the E.T. store currently at Universal Studios fails to provide any product that anyone would actually want to own. From bad stuffed animals to cheap wrist watches, why can’t these toy companies crack it? As I was strolling through the discount aisle at Toys R Us last weekend I stumbled upon the above monstrosity. Really? I mean look at this thing…

Seriously, if a kid came near me with that rubber hand and glowing finger I would run. E.T. go home!

1 comment:

Octopunk said...

E.T. is such a strange phenomenon in so many ways. I remember going so gaga for it and saying so to my cousin who hadn't seen it, then when he saw the poster I had (which had the two fingers high-fiving but was also framed by a bunch of stills) he couldn't believe anything could be so notable when the creature looked like an old man's scrotum.

And therein lies the weirdness! The bullet points, as I seem them:

-- The movie is totally charming and makes you want to have a piece of it yourself.

-- But really nothing happens in it that lends itself to a good toy. A guy gets left behind, he says "yo!", he gets picked up. The end. That's mostly why the video game was doomed from the start.

-- Also, he's a ugly bastard. The movie hit the right nerves to unload a mountain of merchandise, but the title character was (I don't think) designed with that purpose in mind. If you hadn't seen the movie, you might think an E.T. keychain was a month-old lump of beef jerky with eyes.